the evil mint

i think one of the main use of this blog is for me to release my depress-ness...i realise i onli have mood to log in whenever im either down or depress...lol..well at least most of the time...
today- i bad start to begin with...well..actually is so so till i make a bad n unkind decision...well i cant help it though...im not in a great mood...juz let my feeling took over...
i dunno wat is so wrong with me today as im totally in stress...short tempered..n depressed...nothing went right today...is a bad mint day!!!! i always had this habit of releasing temper to ppl whenever im in this situation..which is a horrible thing to do...which i really really need to change..really need to control my emotions properly...
then i got this depress feeling that how come i cant giv my 100% in everything i do..n is totally frustrated whenever things r not up to my expectation..which is often perfection...i cant tolerate myself whenever i cant complete my things perfectly..i cant understand y am i like tat...yaaaa...frusted frusted!!!!! so frusted with myself....whether is my limited ability or am i not hardworking or
focus enough....wats d prob actually??? why why why....why my life is always similar to 'a miss is equal to a mile'...why isit always lack of sumthing...why isit always a miss????? im so so tired laaaaa...yaaaaaaa......

note to myself-letting it out on a bad mood day
- mint gone crazy
- on a pessimistic mode >

today's journey

this morning i wake up...i know i have to embark on a (not so) long but consider long journey...travelling alone gives me time to observe things happening around me...finally back here..feeling great to be home..i reflect on today's journey...
while waiting for rapid 416 at d bustop..which takes like ages..i thought...growing up in a protected enviroment...everything prepared for me..travelling to a place unknown...well not been to before...dunno hows d place looks like alone is totally out of d question...somehow things started to change this few years where i do things tat i never ever thought i will... first on the list-living in d forest! i realise i had become more n more independant...is time to see things not onli through myself but oso others view...
well..at ktm u see so many different types of ppl...their action indirectly shows their personality...some is kind to be considerate...of coz im one of those..hahaha...some using the whole body blocking d entrace...ppl cant move in or out -selfish... pushing ppl in front which is me into d whole thing-scary...ppl moving to give space n helping others to get in-kind..etc..etc...
next i reach kl central...dunno where to get tickets..walk here n there..looking n looking..finally give up ask a guard who look at me ridiculously as the ticket booth is right in front of me..seeing so many ppl there..unfamiliar place..i suddenly had this 'i dun belong here' kind of feel...
then got on putra lrt which is so diff from ktm...u can see different class of ppl there...class of higher life quality..the stations are all at expensive area in the city..ppl on d train is nicely dress..n better courtesy..well this is life i think...money world...
then reach petaling jaya..got lost...another strange feeling..found d place..work done..went home..KTM again..urg horrible..when i reach serdang..wow sense of happiness...yes..i belong here...2 years here is enogh to make me feel like home..of coz pg is still d best...
in conclusion i wanna say i learn alot today... a crazy day with exam on mon...not yet study yet...better go work hard now... == so tired

time...

people say time will wash everything away...i doubt that some time ago...
i began to feel that recent years where things began to fade away...i really get it today as i realise i cant recall how he looks like at all...time once move forward... will never stop...time never look back....is time i move on too...goodbye...my dear fren...thank you for everything....be well be happy be healthy....

crazy me...write so many post in a day...wat to do..depress with myself...
im thinking...is my expectation towards myself too high or wat...how come im always not good enough in something...always know a bit of everything nia...aihz...feel kind of useless today...dissapointed with my ability...or isit im lack of confidence in myself...cant even handle such a minor thing...maybe im juz lazy, scared or even juz finding excuses...argg..is driving me nuts...is mint an extreme average person afterall??? aihz...goodnite...

the colour blue...

Having a blue day today..==
first i woke up late...somehow i forgot to set my alarm last night...so i quickly rush to class...then traffic jam pulak!!! gosh..hate it especially when cars lining up in front of the UPM gate...i mean like cant d car move faster..n stop cutting the queue!!!ok fine..next thinking bout what should i do bout my timetable...over credit onot..mgm or report or spanish...so basically i dun really listen to wat d lec mumbling..hate the arranging thing at d beginning of d same...><

which class which class...decision is so hard to make..in the end..i dun wanna think so much nmore..juz take..d future will fall into d place..lol..then late again to spanish class...dunno wat the lec cakap again...tokin in spanish like a train..in d end dunno wat i tok oso in d presentation...==!


then went to have lunch..so many ppl..no place to sit...went another place..change place for like 4 5 times...>< then hang out in d com lab..thinking bout my timetable AGAIN...>< then after doing some silly things went to photostat notes...zzz..waited long...d person kind of mess up a bit..then i realise my tyre is flat...zzz...wat kind of day isit...!!!!

now...writing blog instead of doing assignmentn washing my big pile of clothes...zzzz..dunno wat im doing today...dun care..i wan sleep d..cure my depression-ness... i'll think tomoro...n seriously..my english is getting bad these days...zzzz...

wat to do..tomoro gonna be a extreme busy day!!! got to go fix this n fix tat...TT
Buddha pls help me...amitaba...

cont

5) to be more hardworking....
6) use more brain when doing things
7) less silly
hopefully tis year is going to be a good year with a better me...

2010

it's a new year...new things in life..new aim..new aspiration...n most importantly...new life...
to achieve list 2010...
1) to burn excess fats...(hopefully)
2) less meat more veggies more water...more exercise- healthier lifestyle
3) a more organized time management
4) sleep earlier...get more sleep...less panda

to be updated...kind of sleepy now...lol